Updated November 2026 · By Kovalya, a Canadian brand
Short answer: a Toi et Moi ring (French for “you and me”) holds two stones side by side, one for each person. With birthstones, it becomes a ring about two people: a couple, a mom and her child, two sisters or two best friends. To choose one, check three things: that both birth months are available, what each stone really looks like (photos often exaggerate the colours), and that the metal is made for everyday wear.
Transparency: we make the KOVA Ring, a Toi et Moi birthstone ring, so we are not neutral. The colour notes and the numbers below come from our own product and our own orders.
What does a Toi et Moi ring mean?
The style dates back centuries and became famous as a two-stone engagement ring. The idea is simple: two stones that sit apart but touch, like two people who stay themselves together. With birthstones, each stone carries a birth month, so the ring tells a story at a glance.
Who it is for
- Couples: your birth month and your partner's, for an anniversary or Valentine's Day.
- A mom and her child: her stone and her baby's, a classic first Mother's Day gift.
- Two children: one stone per child, for a mom of two.
- Sisters or best friends: often bought as two matching rings, one each.
What each birthstone really looks like
Most birthstone jewelry uses simulated stones (crystals or cubic zirconia), and some months look very different in person from the gemstone they are named after. Here is how each stone looks on the KOVA Ring, in our own words:
| Month | Birthstone | How it really looks |
|---|---|---|
| January | Garnet | Deep brownish red |
| February | Amethyst | Pale lilac pink |
| March | Aquamarine | Almost clear, hint of blue |
| April | Crystal (diamond) | Clear, colourless |
| May | Emerald | Green, shade may vary |
| June | Alexandrite | Light purple, shade may vary |
| July | Ruby | Fuchsia pink, not red |
| August | Peridot | Yellow-green, shade may vary |
| September | Sapphire | Deep royal blue |
| October | Tourmaline | Very pale pink, almost clear on gold |
| November | Citrine | Amber orange, not yellow |
| December | Topaz | Blue, shade may vary |
Tip: pairs with contrast stand out most, like September sapphire with April crystal, or July pink with December blue. Two pale stones (March and October, for example) give a more discreet, almost clear ring.
What our customers pick
Across the first 34 KOVA Rings ordered in October 2026:
- The most chosen stones were September (sapphire, 10 stones), June (alexandrite, 9) and August (peridot, 9), out of 68 stones.
- The most ordered pair was March and June (aquamarine and alexandrite), on 4 rings.
- Only 2 rings out of 34 used the same month twice: most people really do choose two different people.
- About 7 in 10 rings were ordered in gold, and about 6 in 10 in size M.
Which metal for everyday wear?
- Stainless steel with a gold or silver finish: made for daily wear and water, and it does not darken like silver can. This is what the KOVA Ring uses.
- Sterling silver (925): a classic precious metal, but it tarnishes over time and needs polishing.
- Plated brass or alloy: often the cheapest, and the most likely to discolour.
Whatever the metal, plating wears faster with chlorine, perfume and harsh soaps. Take the ring off in the pool.
How to get the size right
Wrap a thin strip of paper around the finger, mark where it overlaps, and measure the length in millimetres. That is the ring's inner circumference:
| KOVA Ring size | US size | Circumference |
|---|---|---|
| S | 6 | 52 mm |
| M | 8 | 57 mm |
| L | 10 | 62 mm |
Between two sizes, take the larger one. Buying as a surprise? Borrow a ring she already wears on that finger and measure the inside diameter instead.
The KOVA Ring
The KOVA Ring is our Toi et Moi birthstone ring: two teardrop-cut crystals side by side forming a heart, in 18K gold plating or a polished silver finish over stainless steel, made to order with the two months you choose. Designed to be waterproof, tarnish-resistant and hypoallergenic.
Price (November 2026): US$49.90 in the United States, CA$69.90 in Canada, with a second ring free at the time of writing.
FAQ
What does Toi et Moi mean?
“You and me” in French. It describes a ring with two stones side by side, one for each person.
Are the birthstones real gemstones?
On the KOVA Ring they are teardrop-cut crystals, simulated birthstones, which keeps the price low and the colours consistent. See the table above for what each month really looks like.
Can a mom with three or more kids wear one?
Yes: stack one ring per pair of children. Two or three thin rings worn together look intentional, and each one keeps its own meaning.
Can I wear it in the shower?
It is designed to be waterproof for everyday wear. Take it off in chlorinated pools and hot tubs to protect the finish.
Shopping for a mom? Read our guide: ring for mom with her kids' birthstones.